The Flip Side

So, a blog is where I can put down my feelings about things and yes, this is supposed to be about our grand adventure, but you know that hasn't really started yet.  So I've been throwing out the emotionality of our close quarters and the various stresses that are being visited upon us on a regular basis.

Today, I'm going to try an experiment.  During my talks last week with my friends, they gave me different perspectives about some of my closest relationships and some good advice.  So,  instead of my being upset and feeling like I'm bearing the brunt of things (I know, first world problems), I'm going to view this another way, from a more understanding perspective.  Here goes:

My son is a fifteen-year-old boy, the youngest child in our blended family.  He has an older mom than most of the kids he knows.  I am boring to him and he's right.  He wants people around who can talk and appreciate the subject of cars, cars, and more cars.  My eyes kind of glaze over when he starts bringing up horsepower and body styles, though I do love cars, especially classic cars (or rather, cars I grew up with), but I don't have any brain cells for dissecting the details like he does.

He is probably missing his friends from school.  Even though it was his original idea to be home (boat) schooled, which later grew into this cruise idea, he may have thought it would never happen.  He isn't playing soccer anymore, either, and that was a great outlet for his energy.  He had also expanded into refereeing younger players and that was a great stretch for his mind and body. 

Also, his hormones are raging and the lack of activity has dulled his senses.  He stays busier than I do, unless you count organizing lockers, grocery shopping, and finding all the local thrift shops.

He wants direction from us, as is usual with his age group, but he will also pull in the direction as much as possible, just because he can and it's all part of the test, isn't it?  He's also champing at the bit because he is eligible to get his learner's permit and all he wants to be is behind the wheel of a car.  The helm of a boat definitely lacks the sexiness of of a car's steering wheel.

He is a ridiculously smart guy at times and also sometimes incredibly caring and sweet.  He is great in social situations, very comfortable in almost any setting, whether at a party or in a more intimate gathering.  He knows more people at any marina we've been in than Gary and me put together.  Cars are usually a point of interest with these new acquaintances, but they certainly enjoy his company.

Now, the hubby has an awful lot on his shoulders and I sometimes forget that.  I find myself bored to tears sometimes and he is spread so thin you can almost see through him.

Besides the disappointment in our lightning strike and the extremely slow repair process (this marina has only one full-time mechanic out of the charter company we're using), we've also had to curtail our three-month Chesapeake Bay shakedown cruise.

He has done so much of the work himself, saving the mechanic lots of work and money.  He's probably learned more than he thought he'd ever have to know about this boat, but in hindsight, that will be a good thing down the road if we run into any more issues.  So, down time is nonexistent for him.

There are also some big work issues that have come up (I can't be detailed about this), and so he has a lot on his mind and a lot of decisions to make.  The thing that irritates me is that he doesn't call in his posse when he needs advice or help.  And I really wish he would.  His friends are very smart and some have had serious business experience that would be beneficial to him.  Ah well, what can one do?

Family health issues (both his mom and dad and my dad and stepmom) have popped up, too, and makes our ability to make firm decisions very hard.  I'm not of much use to him because I don't have the mechanical nor electrical ability that he needs for someone to help.

So, I'm coming back into the ship's belly with these ideas at the top of my mind and attempting to be more understanding and maybe a lot more kind.  And maybe I can also work on figuring out why I'm so sensitive to any critical remark, whether it's a 1 or a 10 on the scale.  The boys have promised to bring the sarcastic remarks down a few notches and consider responses before speaking.  And I know, if I speak to the logical part of my brain, my husband only wants me happy.  He'll do almost anything to guarantee that happiness, even in someone like me.

We have definitely redefined the "journey" part of this adventure.  Hope you'll continue along with us as we hope the physical journey will start soon.